site logo
  • Home
  • About
  • Blog
  • Offer
  • Contact
Homepage > Psychology > Psychotherapy and coaching in expat’s life
May 20, 2018 In Psychology

Psychotherapy and coaching in expat’s life

psychotherapy-coaching-expat-life-projectabroadblog

My wish would be for everyone to accept that psychotherapy is not just for “lunatics”. It’s surprising how many times I still hear the “Why would I go to a therapist, I’m not crazy, am I?!” They choose to go to a coach instead, but it turns out that the deep emotional challenges that they are facing exceed the competencies of a coach. So the coach suggests they might want to see a therapist first…

For coach is not a therapist and therapist is not a coach.

Today I’d love to debunk the myths that have grown around therapy and coaching and show you how you can benefit from both those methods to improve the quality of your expat and assignee experience.

It is a fact that many expats or even short-term assignees struggle with grief, low self-esteem, or lowered resilience. This fact however does not mean that because these struggles are common, or as some would say ‘typical’, they are easy to deal with. You don’t have to deal with them yourself.

If you decide to go to the therapist or a coach it does not mean you are self-absorbed and super focused on yourself. It just means that you are ready to face your emotions, thoughts and beliefs, overcome the challenges and as a result build a happy and successful life abroad.

 

Therapist and coach – who are they?

Psychotherapist is someone who has a degree in Psychology as well as usually in addition completed a therapy course to become proficient in a chosen therapy method. There are multiple methods therapists use and more and more people are familiar with certain terms, like for example: psychodynamic, cognitive-behavioural therapy (CBT), Gestalt, systemic etc. Different types of therapy can be more or less effective with certain types of problems. The good news for expats and assignees is that there is a directory of worldwide psychotherapists who work in various languages and focus primarily on working with people of international backgrounds. It’s the International Therapist Directory.

 

Coach does not necessarily need to have a psychological background, but many psychologists nowadays do end up expanding their toolkit with coaching methodology. Coach is someone who has completed a relevant coaching course, eg. from ICF or ICC, which usually lasts for a year or so and requires a certain amount of coaching hours to be completed as part of the certification process. That means it is not like a person is in the classroom for a month or so, and then without any practice goes on and starts coaching others. Again, there are a couple of websites that list coaches working primarily with expats, for example the Expat Coach Directory.

 

In both professions, there are people who call themselves coaches or therapists, but don’t actually have a proper education to claim these titles. Be careful about this and do your research. The professionals who have finished adequate degrees, courses and/or training have more methods and experience they can use while working with you. They have the methodology and experience to help you!

 

You might also like:

The Expat struggle of feeling incompetent

How to mentally prepare for the move abroad?

 

How can therapy and coaching be helpful for an expat?

What can a psychotherapist help you with?

Psychotherapist, first of all, has a much broader knowledge regarding mental disorders than a coach. Unless of course this coach has also completed psychology studies, but let’s separate those two for the sake of this distinction.  Psychotherapy gives us the tools to deal with deep emotional issues, recover from a traumatic experience or loss of someone close, it can be a factor in working through a mental disorder. Very often psychotherapists work with psychiatrists, especially in the context of serious mental disorders that require medicines as part of the process.

In the context of challenges that expats are often facing, a therapist can usually be helpful to deal with depression episodes, grief or self-esteem issues. They have methods that can help you minimize the anxiety and get back on track with your emotions.

 

What can a coach help you with?

A coach, again, for ease let’s assume that this coach does not have a psychological practice, usually works under the assumption that you don’t have any deeper mental issues as those can negatively impact the results of the coaching process. If the coach notices that the challenges that you come with exceed their expertise, they might suggest you see a psychologist first. Many coaches would have therapists that they can recommend to you so that you don’t have to wait a long time in order to get proper help.

Working with a coach puts a lot of responsibility on you as well. You will need to really think through certain challenges, make the effort, do various activities and exercises throughout the process. You will likely break the challenges into smaller pieces, you will likely create some new goals and will be encouraged to follow through. You will likely be looking mostly forward and not focusing on the past. You will likely work on your strengths and using them throughout the coaching process.

 

You might also like:

Expat stress Explained

What do others know about you that you don’t – and why does it matter? 

 

Choose the right person to help you

Choosing your therapist

Before you choose a therapist, it is worth familiarizing yourself with some basic therapy types and seeing which method seems to resonate best with you. If you want to work on your current habits and explore how they affect you, you might want to choose CBT. If however, you feel like exploring your past and going deep into the emotional layers is something that you would like to do, or if you are bothered by some beasts from the past, psychodynamic approach might be a better method for you. It really is about doing some research, trying out a few sessions in different approaches and seeing what works best for you.

 

Choosing your coach

There are also different types of coaching in this profession. However, I feel that in terms of methodology they are not so different as the ones in therapy.  It is still worth researching to see whether one resonates with you better than the other. With coaching, it is important to find a person who you click with, which is similar to therapy too. It is important that you trust the person and believe that they are really focusing on what’s best for you.

You can also ask the coach, especially if they are also cross-cultural trainers, to play a role of a mentor or personal trainer. This can be particularly helpful if you want to work through a specific intercultural challenge that you are facing at work. The coaching session might then be split into two parts. First, the coach would share some knowledge with you related to the challenge you’re having, or propose a certain type of self-assessment tool, and then you could work through and practice actual conversations that you will need to have.

 

 

Going to a therapist or a coach should not intimidate you. It does not mean you are crazy or weak. The sooner you react and get help relevant to your challenges, the better.

Because some expat struggles are common, it does not mean they are easy to deal with. Don’t wait until they overwhelm you.

expat life healthy mind knowledge mental health psychology
Previous StoryWhy learn about cross-cultural communication?
Next StoryGerman Business Culture: How I struggled, coped and ultimately flourished

Related Articles:

  • travel-home
    Types Of Expat Visits Home – Which One Are You?
  • marta-notebook-1
    5 easy ways to overcome self-doubt after moving abroad

Author

Marta Zielińska

Hi, my name is Marta. I am combining my psychological, business and intercultural experience to offer advice on successful living and working across cultures. I believe that everything is possible for such an ambitious and talented person as yourself! With some exercises, self-reflection and new knowledge, you can grow your cultural intelligence and build a successful international career, mind and life.

Learn more

Recent Posts

  • Types Of Expat Visits Home – Which One Are You?
  • 5 easy ways to overcome self-doubt after moving abroad
  • Want to be a great global leader?
  • Is moving abroad a good choice?
  • D.I.V.E. in with awareness or stay confused

Instagram

Sometimes we have a toolkit full of tools already - those that we learned through experience, different courses or articles, that someone shared with us. ⁠
⁠
But - we may not be sure how to use them in practice! Or get overwhelmed by the amount of information out there and how to make sense of it, put it all together.⁠
⁠
Meeting with a coach can support you in choosing the best tools, reminding you how to use them, or show you a different way to use the existing resources. ⁠
⁠
Do you feel like you technically should know how to deal with X, but you just don't know where to start? ⁠
Maybe that's your cue to reach out to me to learn more about how coaching can be helfpul 😊 ⁠
DM me the word 'COACH' and let's chat! ⁠
⁠
⁠
⁠
#expatcoaching #expatlife #livingabroad #expatcoach #workingabroad #lifeabroad #workabroad #careerabroad #internationallife #internationalcareer #globalcareer #globallife #globalleaders #culturalawareness #selfawareness #selfgrowth #personalgrowth #personaldevelopment #culturalcompetence #movingabroad #zyciezagranica #zycienaemigracji #pracazagranica #rozwojosobisty #polacyzagranica
•
Follow
Sometimes we have a toolkit full of tools already - those that we learned through experience, different courses or articles, that someone shared with us. ⁠ ⁠ But - we may not be sure how to use them in practice! Or get overwhelmed by the amount of information out there and how to make sense of it, put it all together.⁠ ⁠ Meeting with a coach can support you in choosing the best tools, reminding you how to use them, or show you a different way to use the existing resources. ⁠ ⁠ Do you feel like you technically should know how to deal with X, but you just don't know where to start? ⁠ Maybe that's your cue to reach out to me to learn more about how coaching can be helfpul 😊 ⁠ DM me the word 'COACH' and let's chat! ⁠ ⁠ ⁠ ⁠ #expatcoaching #expatlife #livingabroad #expatcoach #workingabroad #lifeabroad #workabroad #careerabroad #internationallife #internationalcareer #globalcareer #globallife #globalleaders #culturalawareness #selfawareness #selfgrowth #personalgrowth #personaldevelopment #culturalcompetence #movingabroad #zyciezagranica #zycienaemigracji #pracazagranica #rozwojosobisty #polacyzagranica
3 days ago
View on Instagram |
1/9
Do you sometimes catch yourself saying or doing things that feel ‘out of character’? That may happen as a result of the internal process that’s happening between the situation occurring and that result taking place.

Good news is: you can have insight into the ‘in-between’!

This S-PACE-R tool can help you analyse how your thoughts, actions, feelings and body reactions all impact each other to produce a certain result. 

Let’s look at an example.
👉Situation: you scroll through IG and notice a post from an expat who is at a party, laughing with friends.
👉Physical reaction: you feel a constraint in the stomach and notice your eyes watering.
👉Action: you go into the person’s profile and watch more of their posts.
👉Emotion: you feel sad because you don’t seem to be having such a rich social life abroad so far
👉Thoughts: “I’m a failure, I can’t find myself any friends here”, “This move wasn’t worth it” 
(These influences can go either way and can start at any point in the circle, by the way! Often, they also go on in circles and augment each other too!)
👉Result: You stay at home, soaking in your sadness, not going out, not putting yourself out there, not making friends - and proving your initial thought. 
You see the potential downward spiral effect here?

Of course - it doesn’t need to be that way, or even as dramatic! But you’d be surprised how quickly we can notice these little interrelations in many situations in our lives. 

Having the self-awareness about these though can help you regain control and reframe thoughts where needed to facilitate more supportive behaviours and in turn gain better results! 

It can be difficult to work through these by yourself at first. As a coach, I can provide you with support and accountability in this process. You in? 😊 DM me.
•
Follow
Do you sometimes catch yourself saying or doing things that feel ‘out of character’? That may happen as a result of the internal process that’s happening between the situation occurring and that result taking place. Good news is: you can have insight into the ‘in-between’! This S-PACE-R tool can help you analyse how your thoughts, actions, feelings and body reactions all impact each other to produce a certain result. Let’s look at an example. 👉Situation: you scroll through IG and notice a post from an expat who is at a party, laughing with friends. 👉Physical reaction: you feel a constraint in the stomach and notice your eyes watering. 👉Action: you go into the person’s profile and watch more of their posts. 👉Emotion: you feel sad because you don’t seem to be having such a rich social life abroad so far 👉Thoughts: “I’m a failure, I can’t find myself any friends here”, “This move wasn’t worth it” (These influences can go either way and can start at any point in the circle, by the way! Often, they also go on in circles and augment each other too!) 👉Result: You stay at home, soaking in your sadness, not going out, not putting yourself out there, not making friends - and proving your initial thought. You see the potential downward spiral effect here? Of course - it doesn’t need to be that way, or even as dramatic! But you’d be surprised how quickly we can notice these little interrelations in many situations in our lives. Having the self-awareness about these though can help you regain control and reframe thoughts where needed to facilitate more supportive behaviours and in turn gain better results! It can be difficult to work through these by yourself at first. As a coach, I can provide you with support and accountability in this process. You in? 😊 DM me.
6 days ago
View on Instagram |
2/9
Ever wondered how your cultural background impacts your working preferences? 🧐⁠
⁠
You hear me talk about cultural dimensions quite a bit here. I believe that understanding the drivers of our behaviour in that international context is super important to buildling confidence in working in another culture (so a slightly different focus than your MBTIs or Enneagrams etc). ⁠
⁠
And it's not just theory and what-ifs! ⁠
⁠
We've got a reliable tool which helps you get more insights into where you stand on ten cultural dimensions and how does it compare to the cross-cultural studies which have been conducted over the years. ⁠
⁠
👉️If you'd like to stop wondering and get more concrete - DM me the word 'CULTURE' and I'll share more details with you on how the assessment and your personalised report review with me work. ⁠
⁠
The insight doesn't end just on doing the assessment and viewing results. In fact, my packages don't include just the assessment, they always come with a report review and consultation to give you the space to reflect on the results and how you can implement the insights to improve your intercultural communication at work or in personal life. ⁠
⁠
You can read more details on the website in the 'Offer' Tab (link in bio) 😊⁠
⁠
#expatcoaching #expatlife #livingabroad #expatcoach #workingabroad #lifeabroad #workabroad #careerabroad #internationallife #internationalcareer #globalcareer #globallife #globalleaders #culturalawareness #selfawareness #selfgrowth #personalgrowth #personaldevelopment #culturalcompetence #movingabroad #zyciezagranica #zycienaemigracji #pracazagranica #rozwojosobisty #polacyzagranica
•
Follow
Ever wondered how your cultural background impacts your working preferences? 🧐⁠ ⁠ You hear me talk about cultural dimensions quite a bit here. I believe that understanding the drivers of our behaviour in that international context is super important to buildling confidence in working in another culture (so a slightly different focus than your MBTIs or Enneagrams etc). ⁠ ⁠ And it's not just theory and what-ifs! ⁠ ⁠ We've got a reliable tool which helps you get more insights into where you stand on ten cultural dimensions and how does it compare to the cross-cultural studies which have been conducted over the years. ⁠ ⁠ 👉️If you'd like to stop wondering and get more concrete - DM me the word 'CULTURE' and I'll share more details with you on how the assessment and your personalised report review with me work. ⁠ ⁠ The insight doesn't end just on doing the assessment and viewing results. In fact, my packages don't include just the assessment, they always come with a report review and consultation to give you the space to reflect on the results and how you can implement the insights to improve your intercultural communication at work or in personal life. ⁠ ⁠ You can read more details on the website in the 'Offer' Tab (link in bio) 😊⁠ ⁠ #expatcoaching #expatlife #livingabroad #expatcoach #workingabroad #lifeabroad #workabroad #careerabroad #internationallife #internationalcareer #globalcareer #globallife #globalleaders #culturalawareness #selfawareness #selfgrowth #personalgrowth #personaldevelopment #culturalcompetence #movingabroad #zyciezagranica #zycienaemigracji #pracazagranica #rozwojosobisty #polacyzagranica
1 week ago
View on Instagram |
3/9
#expatcoaching #expatlife #livingabroad #expatcoach #workingabroad #lifeabroad #workabroad #careerabroad #internationallife #internationalcareer #globalcareer #globallife #globalleaders #culturalawareness #selfawareness #selfgrowth #personalgrowth #personaldevelopment #culturalcompetence #movingabroad #zyciezagranica #zycienaemigracji #pracazagranica #rozwojosobisty #polacyzagranica #lifetransitions #lifecrisis
•
Follow
#expatcoaching #expatlife #livingabroad #expatcoach #workingabroad #lifeabroad #workabroad #careerabroad #internationallife #internationalcareer #globalcareer #globallife #globalleaders #culturalawareness #selfawareness #selfgrowth #personalgrowth #personaldevelopment #culturalcompetence #movingabroad #zyciezagranica #zycienaemigracji #pracazagranica #rozwojosobisty #polacyzagranica #lifetransitions #lifecrisis
2 weeks ago
View on Instagram |
4/9
Intercultural communication is mostly about YOU, not them. ⁠
There, I said it! ☝️⁠
⁠
Why is it about you? ⁠
⁠
Well, it's not about 'them' behaving a certain way, doing things differently or weird or being hard to work with. ⁠
⁠
You can't change 'them'. BUT - - you can understand yourself in relation to the other people's way of working, and decide if you want to do something about it. ⁠
⁠
Your options are: ⁠
1️⃣ Do nothing. Keep the frustration, delay the results and progress, deepen the gap between us and them. ⁠
⁠
2️⃣ Communicate to the other person directly to say that clearly something is not working and you find a way to work effectively together towards that same goal. ⁠
⁠
3️⃣ And better yet - C) actually go beyond just that and build your cultural awareness before that conversation, and continue with that development going forward - to understand your own values, your own cultural influences, how they relate to the challenging situation you faced. ⁠
And finally - expand your repertoire of communication strategies, so that perhaps you can adapt and increase efficiency in your work without confronting the other person at all 😉⁠
⁠
How does that sound for you? 🤔⁠
⁠
#expatcoaching #expatlife #livingabroad #expatcoach #workingabroad #lifeabroad #workabroad #careerabroad #internationallife #internationalcareer #globalcareer #globallife #globalleaders #culturalawareness #selfawareness #selfgrowth #personalgrowth #personaldevelopment #culturalcompetence #movingabroad #zyciezagranica #zycienaemigracji #pracazagranica #rozwojosobisty #polacyzagranica
•
Follow
Intercultural communication is mostly about YOU, not them. ⁠ There, I said it! ☝️⁠ ⁠ Why is it about you? ⁠ ⁠ Well, it's not about 'them' behaving a certain way, doing things differently or weird or being hard to work with. ⁠ ⁠ You can't change 'them'. BUT - - you can understand yourself in relation to the other people's way of working, and decide if you want to do something about it. ⁠ ⁠ Your options are: ⁠ 1️⃣ Do nothing. Keep the frustration, delay the results and progress, deepen the gap between us and them. ⁠ ⁠ 2️⃣ Communicate to the other person directly to say that clearly something is not working and you find a way to work effectively together towards that same goal. ⁠ ⁠ 3️⃣ And better yet - C) actually go beyond just that and build your cultural awareness before that conversation, and continue with that development going forward - to understand your own values, your own cultural influences, how they relate to the challenging situation you faced. ⁠ And finally - expand your repertoire of communication strategies, so that perhaps you can adapt and increase efficiency in your work without confronting the other person at all 😉⁠ ⁠ How does that sound for you? 🤔⁠ ⁠ #expatcoaching #expatlife #livingabroad #expatcoach #workingabroad #lifeabroad #workabroad #careerabroad #internationallife #internationalcareer #globalcareer #globallife #globalleaders #culturalawareness #selfawareness #selfgrowth #personalgrowth #personaldevelopment #culturalcompetence #movingabroad #zyciezagranica #zycienaemigracji #pracazagranica #rozwojosobisty #polacyzagranica
3 weeks ago
View on Instagram |
5/9
#expatcoaching #expatlife #livingabroad #expatcoach #workingabroad #lifeabroad #workabroad #careerabroad #internationallife #internationalcareer #globalcareer #globallife #globalleaders #culturalawareness #selfawareness #selfgrowth #personalgrowth #personaldevelopment #culturalcompetence #movingabroad #zyciezagranica #zycienaemigracji #pracazagranica #rozwojosobisty #polacyzagranica
•
Follow
#expatcoaching #expatlife #livingabroad #expatcoach #workingabroad #lifeabroad #workabroad #careerabroad #internationallife #internationalcareer #globalcareer #globallife #globalleaders #culturalawareness #selfawareness #selfgrowth #personalgrowth #personaldevelopment #culturalcompetence #movingabroad #zyciezagranica #zycienaemigracji #pracazagranica #rozwojosobisty #polacyzagranica
3 weeks ago
View on Instagram |
6/9
Which ones are you happy with? ⁠

Which ones would you like to develop further? ⁠

Any that you'd add to the list as key skills for people who live abroad? ⁠
⁠
⁠
#expatcoaching #expatlife #livingabroad #expatcoach #workingabroad #lifeabroad #workabroad #careerabroad #internationallife #internationalcareer #globalcareer #globallife #globalleaders #culturalawareness #selfawareness #selfgrowth #personalgrowth #personaldevelopment #culturalcompetence #movingabroad #zyciezagranica #zycienaemigracji #pracazagranica #rozwojosobisty #polacyzagranica
Which ones are you happy with? ⁠

Which ones would you like to develop further? ⁠

Any that you'd add to the list as key skills for people who live abroad? ⁠
⁠
⁠
#expatcoaching #expatlife #livingabroad #expatcoach #workingabroad #lifeabroad #workabroad #careerabroad #internationallife #internationalcareer #globalcareer #globallife #globalleaders #culturalawareness #selfawareness #selfgrowth #personalgrowth #personaldevelopment #culturalcompetence #movingabroad #zyciezagranica #zycienaemigracji #pracazagranica #rozwojosobisty #polacyzagranica
Which ones are you happy with? ⁠

Which ones would you like to develop further? ⁠

Any that you'd add to the list as key skills for people who live abroad? ⁠
⁠
⁠
#expatcoaching #expatlife #livingabroad #expatcoach #workingabroad #lifeabroad #workabroad #careerabroad #internationallife #internationalcareer #globalcareer #globallife #globalleaders #culturalawareness #selfawareness #selfgrowth #personalgrowth #personaldevelopment #culturalcompetence #movingabroad #zyciezagranica #zycienaemigracji #pracazagranica #rozwojosobisty #polacyzagranica
Which ones are you happy with? ⁠

Which ones would you like to develop further? ⁠

Any that you'd add to the list as key skills for people who live abroad? ⁠
⁠
⁠
#expatcoaching #expatlife #livingabroad #expatcoach #workingabroad #lifeabroad #workabroad #careerabroad #internationallife #internationalcareer #globalcareer #globallife #globalleaders #culturalawareness #selfawareness #selfgrowth #personalgrowth #personaldevelopment #culturalcompetence #movingabroad #zyciezagranica #zycienaemigracji #pracazagranica #rozwojosobisty #polacyzagranica
Which ones are you happy with? ⁠

Which ones would you like to develop further? ⁠

Any that you'd add to the list as key skills for people who live abroad? ⁠
⁠
⁠
#expatcoaching #expatlife #livingabroad #expatcoach #workingabroad #lifeabroad #workabroad #careerabroad #internationallife #internationalcareer #globalcareer #globallife #globalleaders #culturalawareness #selfawareness #selfgrowth #personalgrowth #personaldevelopment #culturalcompetence #movingabroad #zyciezagranica #zycienaemigracji #pracazagranica #rozwojosobisty #polacyzagranica
Which ones are you happy with? ⁠

Which ones would you like to develop further? ⁠

Any that you'd add to the list as key skills for people who live abroad? ⁠
⁠
⁠
#expatcoaching #expatlife #livingabroad #expatcoach #workingabroad #lifeabroad #workabroad #careerabroad #internationallife #internationalcareer #globalcareer #globallife #globalleaders #culturalawareness #selfawareness #selfgrowth #personalgrowth #personaldevelopment #culturalcompetence #movingabroad #zyciezagranica #zycienaemigracji #pracazagranica #rozwojosobisty #polacyzagranica
•
Follow
Which ones are you happy with? ⁠ Which ones would you like to develop further? ⁠ Any that you'd add to the list as key skills for people who live abroad? ⁠ ⁠ ⁠ #expatcoaching #expatlife #livingabroad #expatcoach #workingabroad #lifeabroad #workabroad #careerabroad #internationallife #internationalcareer #globalcareer #globallife #globalleaders #culturalawareness #selfawareness #selfgrowth #personalgrowth #personaldevelopment #culturalcompetence #movingabroad #zyciezagranica #zycienaemigracji #pracazagranica #rozwojosobisty #polacyzagranica
4 weeks ago
View on Instagram |
7/9
It is a bit of everything everywhere all at once, would you agree? 😃😅

#expatcoaching #expatlife #livingabroad #expatcoach #workingabroad #lifeabroad #workabroad #careerabroad #internationallife #internationalcareer #globalcareer #globallife #globalleaders #culturalawareness #selfawareness #selfgrowth #personalgrowth #personaldevelopment #culturalcompetence #movingabroad #zyciezagranica #zycienaemigracji #pracazagranica #rozwojosobisty #polacyzagranica
•
Follow
It is a bit of everything everywhere all at once, would you agree? 😃😅 #expatcoaching #expatlife #livingabroad #expatcoach #workingabroad #lifeabroad #workabroad #careerabroad #internationallife #internationalcareer #globalcareer #globallife #globalleaders #culturalawareness #selfawareness #selfgrowth #personalgrowth #personaldevelopment #culturalcompetence #movingabroad #zyciezagranica #zycienaemigracji #pracazagranica #rozwojosobisty #polacyzagranica
4 weeks ago
View on Instagram |
8/9
🤷I know what I need to do, but it doesn't feel genuine! 
🤷I know they do that, but it feels so rude, I just can't get myself to do it! 
🤷I know I've got to stop myself from doing that, but it just feels unlike me not to!

The above are quotes from people I worked with. 

The 1st person, let's call her Anna, moved from Poland to the UK, and really struggled with the small talk. It's not like we don't casually chat in Poland, but it doesn't play as big of a role in building connections in professional settings. She knew she needed to engage in the chit chat, but she wasn't used to it happening so many times in a day! It didn't feel genuine or meaningful as people talked to her almost in passing.

The 2nd person, let's call her Hope, moved from Malaysia to Spain. She wasn't used to the loud and dynamic exchanges common among the Spanish. Growing up she was told not to interrupt others when they're talking - it's rude! Silence played a big part in professional conversations, showing consideration and respect to those she was interacting with. In Spain, she found herself unable to fully engage in meetings, labelled as 'the quiet one'. She saw what others were doing, she knew she had to engage differently, but it was just SO hard to get over the initial beliefs! 

The 3rd person had the opposite problem to Hope's. Diego moved from Spain to the UK, and was struggling with the feedback he started receiving, along the lines of 'he's too excitable, he interrupts others as they're talking, he's too casual'. He knew he needed to tone down his communication, be more conscious about the pace of the conversation. He was able to do it, but what he struggled with the most is that it didn't feel like the real HIM anymore. He considered moving back to Spain because of that even though the UK career opportunities were clearly better for him at the time. 

All of them had the ability to shape their behaviour differently, they knew what they needed to do. It was not the lack of knowledge that was stopping them - it was the beliefs. In our coaching meetings we worked to find their origins, untangle them, and start creating beliefs that served them better in their new lives abroad.
•
Follow
🤷I know what I need to do, but it doesn't feel genuine! 🤷I know they do that, but it feels so rude, I just can't get myself to do it! 🤷I know I've got to stop myself from doing that, but it just feels unlike me not to! The above are quotes from people I worked with. The 1st person, let's call her Anna, moved from Poland to the UK, and really struggled with the small talk. It's not like we don't casually chat in Poland, but it doesn't play as big of a role in building connections in professional settings. She knew she needed to engage in the chit chat, but she wasn't used to it happening so many times in a day! It didn't feel genuine or meaningful as people talked to her almost in passing. The 2nd person, let's call her Hope, moved from Malaysia to Spain. She wasn't used to the loud and dynamic exchanges common among the Spanish. Growing up she was told not to interrupt others when they're talking - it's rude! Silence played a big part in professional conversations, showing consideration and respect to those she was interacting with. In Spain, she found herself unable to fully engage in meetings, labelled as 'the quiet one'. She saw what others were doing, she knew she had to engage differently, but it was just SO hard to get over the initial beliefs! The 3rd person had the opposite problem to Hope's. Diego moved from Spain to the UK, and was struggling with the feedback he started receiving, along the lines of 'he's too excitable, he interrupts others as they're talking, he's too casual'. He knew he needed to tone down his communication, be more conscious about the pace of the conversation. He was able to do it, but what he struggled with the most is that it didn't feel like the real HIM anymore. He considered moving back to Spain because of that even though the UK career opportunities were clearly better for him at the time. All of them had the ability to shape their behaviour differently, they knew what they needed to do. It was not the lack of knowledge that was stopping them - it was the beliefs. In our coaching meetings we worked to find their origins, untangle them, and start creating beliefs that served them better in their new lives abroad.
1 month ago
View on Instagram |
9/9
View on Instagram

ProjectAbroad on Facebook

Project Abroad

 

PRIVACY POLICY

© Copyright Project Abroad 2016.