Introversion is not a disease. But those who are introverted know that being that way can pose some challenges in today’s world. There is a tendency to reward primarily extrovert behaviours, such as the ability to quickly build rapport with multiple colleagues during a networking event, express your emotions openly or socialise in a work environment.
This is not to say that introverts can’t do all the above things. They might simply prefer to build rapport and socialise in a different way which is often misunderstood by more extroverted colleagues. They can be equally effective at work and in managerial positions although working in a slightly different way. So…
What are the biggest introvert struggles among expats?
How to address them?
How can employers help introverts adapt?
Connectivity events
Many introverts find frequent social events quite tiring, especially if they are rather big informal networking gatherings. Very often in the “westernised” professional world, open business networking is a go-to, easy to organise type of event. This might also be true for many internal initiatives that employers launch to help their assignees feel more welcome and adapt quickly.
While it might be a great way to connect extroverts to the local community, it’s not necessarily the case for more introverted colleagues. Introverted colleagues might only go to one or two of those big events. If the expectation is to meet many people in a quick period of time, they might potentially fail.
Why is that?
One of the characteristics of introversion is that too frequent social events are simply tiring and require an appropriate amount of time to recharge afterwards. That applies even if the events are with their group of friends and in a voluntary situation. When it comes to professional connectivity events, this might pose more pressure and will require some more time to recharge. One might therefore notice that introverts can be picky about the events they are attending. And they should not be penalised for that.
Tips for introverts: Although it is something that requires a significant of energy from you, it might not be wise to avoid those events at the beginning. Seize opportunities to establish yourself in the local community. Equally though, if you reeeeally feel like you have had enough and your energy levels are not as high as you would usually expect them to be – take your time to recharge. To avoid getting stuck, it might be a good idea to set yourself an estimate time that will be required for recharge after a big networking event. Thanks to this, you will avoid getting into the situation where you just keep refusing to attend everything under the sabotaging argument of ‘not having the mental energy’ to go.
Tips for employers: Acknowledge that big, generic, informal networking events in the office might not be the best way for some people to connect and build relationships. You will find that introverts have a tendency to speak to people for longer during such events, rather than schmooze and quickly change conversation partners to speak to as many people as possible. This likely doesn’t mean that they are unsociable. It might also be a good idea to create smaller interest groups or themed events that will enable those who want to attend them slightly deeper connections.
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Dealing with logistics and asking for help
Especially one type of introversion, the anxious type, might struggle with asking others for help in managing their moving logistics. As we all know, moving to another country requires a lot of paperwork, setting yourself up legally in a given country, opening a local bank account, finding a place to live, finding your affordable grocery store, hairdresser etc.
Now… one can do it all by themselves, but realistically it will take a lot of time to research every single one of those things and try them all out to pick the best one. One of the most widely quoted benefits of moving abroad is the opportunity to go out of your comfort zone. Well, it can be twice as hard for someone who is a bit more anxious.
Tips for introverts: I know that it might be less stressful to just spend hours on the Internet and try to figure out things for yourself. But think about it that way – instead of sitting by your laptop all day for the first week, you might be killing two birds on one stone through solving your problems together with other people. It’s a great time to make connections, ask people about their favourite places. You can learn more about them and see what they like during such a conversation. The topic for the conversation is already there, and you don’t have to do this in a big group, but rather reach out to various people individually.
Tips for employers: You will 100% encounter at least two different types of employees who will be joining you from abroad. One would take things as they are, rely on others’ opinions and recommendations as well as their advice. The other one might need some more guidance, especially if they don’t have any friends in their new location. A thing you can do to help them out is to create some sort of internal website or presentation which would outline the key things they need to think about when arriving to this new country. You could also include various recommendations for restaurants nearby, good deals and contacts to people who can help them with different questions. That way you spare them the time they would need to spend to look for those relevant colleagues to speak to, and you are also reducing the anxiety related to the move.
Opening up about your feelings
We have established last week that the fact that introverts have the tendency to show less feelings to the outside world, does not mean that they don’t have them. In fact, because of the preference for directing emotions and thoughts inwards, their emotional life can actually be quite rich and the self-awareness may be higher.
In some countries, this kind of behaviour may be very valued. That would be in cultures which are generally classed as Neutral or Non-Expressive, such as some countries of Confucian Asia or Nordic Europe, where the emphasis is on a more non-emotional communication and not sharing feelings that openly.
In others which are more expressive, introverts might need to adjust their behaviour slightly to enable a successful adaptation. Practice makes perfect! In regions such as US or Latin America, you can expect the tendency to be more expressive and share your emotions more openly, also with the team members at work.
Tips for introverts: Try to observe how open people are about their emotions. There is a thin line in some places between sharing and oversharing (#TooMuchInformation). By observing what personal topics or struggles people discuss at work, you will be very quickly able to see what you could start sharing as well. I know that sometimes there might be a blocker in a form of “I don’t want to overload them with my problems”. In reality, being honest about what’s going on in your head and any personal struggles that may affect your work, can help your team members react to your situation adequately. If you are struggling – you should seek help. I think that the World Mental Health Day is a great opportunity to raise awareness about the importance of obtaining help if you need it.
Tips for employers: Be aware that people might have different levels of their emotional expressiveness. That awareness will already hopefully help you be more vigilant and notice if there is anything worrying happening with the employee which you should address. Don’t overinterpret either, but observe regularly.
What other struggles do you think are particularly characteristic for introverts? How would you deal with them?
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